New Moon Meet-Up at the Scorpio Cafe

Mercury in Sagittarius: Alright Lords and Ladies, shall we call this meeting to order? The first item on our agenda pertains to the continuing theme of change for the masses. Sonny, do you want to speak about that?

Sun in Scorpio: Thank you. Luna and I have come together in order to add greater energy to the shifts taking place on planet Earth. We will open up a new lunar portal on Monday, November 16.

Venus in Scorpio: Can I just say that I feel somewhat hurt that you left me out of your alliance with Mistress Moon? I mean hello, we’re practically neighbours. I have just as much to do with the shifting tides as you or anyone else.

Moon in Scorpio: Shifting tides are my domain.

Venus in Scorpio: It was a metaphor.

Sun in Scorpio: We all have our roles to play in the unfolding destiny of our universe. Venus, your close proximity to me and Luna offers grace to people in fear of losing everything they hold dear.

Venus in Scorpio: It’s nice to be acknowledged. Thank you.

Mercury in Sagittarius: So, new change: Sonny, Luna – do either of you want to expand on what you mean by that?

Moon in Scorpio: We want to assist the humans in their transformations. But they’re terribly stuck. They’re so fixated on possessions that they can’t make room for anything new.

Sun in Scorpio: Exactly. So we need to impress upon the people that they need to make a sacrifice.

Neptune in Aquarius: You know I appreciate a good sacrifice, but didn’t we ban sacrificial offerings sometime after the Age of Taurus?

Pluto in Capricorn: Sweetheart, where have you been? I’ve been forcing people to make sacrifices for eons.

Neptune in Aquarius: But your methods are cruel. Ripping loved ones apart, debilitating people’s health.

Pluto in Capricorn: You’re one to talk. Helped anyone climb into a bottle of Jack Daniels, lately?

Mercury in Sagittarius: So anyways, getting back to our actual topic…What kind of changes do you anticipate, and what kind of sacrifices are you looking for?

Saturn in Libra: I can speak to that. One of the most sweeping changes we expect is the way in which humans inter-relate with one another.

Mercury in Sagittarius: Meaning?

Venus in Scorpio: Lord Saturn means romance. He just hates to use that word.

Saturn in Libra: Nonsense. There’s more to relationships than fluff. Need I remind you that all commercial transactions are founded on right relations?

Venus in Scorpio: Obviously I know that. You forget that relationships and finances are the very energies that I embody.

Pluto in Capricorn: Reforming human relationships? That’s pretty small potatoes compared to what I’m up against. I’m single-handedly trying to change the entire fabric of human society.

Uranus retrograde in Pisces: What am I, chopped liver? I’ve been trying to wake these humans up for years.

Pluto in Capricorn: Right, while you smoke another fatty.

Neptune in Aquarius: Did someone say something about smoking a big fatty?

Mercury in Sagittarius: Please come to order!

Saturn in Libra: Thank you. Back to what I was saying, for you’re missing a crucial point, Lord Pluto: you can’t expect to change the fabric of society solely by tearing it to shreds. As much as I appreciate steady progress, your tactics are somewhat ruthless. There needs to be a bit of balance or people will simply give up and accomplish nothing as a result.

Venus in Scorpio: Very well said.

Saturn in Libra: Moreover, what are societies built on, if not a series of relationships?

Pluto in Capricorn: Not that I couldn’t hang out here for years, but what’s your point?

Saturn in Libra: My point is that, if we’re going to help the humans evolve beyond their petty egos –

Mars in Leo: Hey, what do you have against egos, all of a sudden?

Saturn in Libra: (shoots Mars a look) If we’re going to help the humans evolve beyond their petty egos in order to build decent societies, then we’re going to have to teach them how to build relationships that can withstand the tests of time. And that starts with admitting that some things must change if two people are going to grow old together.

Mars in Leo: (under his breath) Well, you know all about growing old.

Venus in Scorpio: So you are talking about love relationships.

Mercury in Sagittarius: Then I suppose our happy couple here (indicatingVenus and Mars) should be involved in directing some of those relationship changes.

Mars in Leo: No way, man. I’m with the Prince of Darkness over there (nodding to Pluto). All of this relationship babble is making me edgy.

Uranus retrograde in Pisces: Whoa, you think you’re edgy?

Venus in Scorpio: I agree with our winged messenger. Since the humans place faith in our ability to get along, we ought to set a loving example of how to cooperate.

(Mars groans.)

Venus in Scorpio: What? Too attached to your precious identity to share anything real or meaningful with me?

Mars in Leo: I’m not interested in getting swallowed up by your emotions.

Venus in Scorpio: Love me, love my shadow.

Mars in Leo: I want to get out there and make my mark on the world!

Sun in Scorpio: Mars, seeing as you’re already holding the bucket that we currently find ourselves in, I want you to lead the people. But no ego trips, okay? Move from your heart.

Venus in Scorpio: Nicely said, Sonny.

Mars in Leo: Is that all you have to offer? A few “nicely saids” here and there?

Saturn in Libra: A little decorum, please. Let’s return our focus to the agenda of change at this lunar portal.

Pluto in Capricorn: Seriously? The keeper of the status quo is suddenly the champion of change? Does anyone else see the irony here?

Jupiter in Aquarius: I’ll tell you what I see: Because Mars is still the loudest man on campus, he gets the honour of playing leader, yet again. I have a problem with that.

Moon in Scorpio: Are you jealous?

Jupiter in Aquarius: What? No! But let’s face it: Mars is good for short-term tactics – but putting him in charge of a long revolution? I don’t think he’s got the stick-to-it-ive-ness to handle the job.

Mars in Leo: Hey man, I’m hanging around Leo ‘til, like Summer. That’s a really super long time.

Neptune in Aquarius: You should spend a day with me, my dear. That ought to alter your perceptions of time just a bit.

Jupiter in Aquarius: (to Mars) And, more to the point, your annoying need to be special completely invalidates anyone else’s abilities.

Mars in Leo: Well, I’m totally unique. And I’m not interested in getting lost in your mob. I’m a force to be reckoned with.

Jupiter in Aquarius: You think you’re the only force for change around here? What do you think we’ve been doing all year long (gesturing to Chiron and Neptune)?

Mars in Leo: Dude, you totally inspire like everyone…to hit their snooze buttons. Which makes my job of rallying the peeps into action kinda tough.

Jupiter in Aquarius: It’s the barbaric nature of your action that disturbs me. Love the work you’re doing in Afghanistan. How’s that war in the name of democracy working out for you?

Mars in Leo: Democracy’s your world, not mine.

Uranus retrograde in Pisces: Uh, technically democracy’s part of my portfolio.

Mercury in Sagittarius: Look guys, uh, how are we supposed to assist the humans through these next few years if we can’t even get along?

Mars in Leo: We could all come together and wage a war against war!

Uranus retrograde in Pisces: I like a big upset as much as you, but enough with all of the wars. There has to be a peaceful solution. I can’t very well awaken the masses to Spirit just to send them off to battle, can I?

Neptune in Aquarius: Agreed. It’s time for a revolution of a more spiritual nature. We want people to lay down their guns…

Jupiter in Aquarius: …to have faith in a new Brotherhood of Man…

Venus in Scorpio: …and Sisterhood of Woman…

Saturn in Libra: …for all men and women to recognize that their equality with each other cannot extend into the greater social arena until they live it in their personal relationships.

Sun, Moon, Earth, Venus, Jupiter, Chiron, Neptune, Uranus: Hear hear!

Mercury in Sagittarius: Containers. Give the people containers.

Earth: Please, no more damn containers; they all end up in land-fills – and I’m bursting, as it is. I feel like a pregnant cow that can’t give birth.

Mercury in Sagittarius: No, I mean: big ideas need a container if they’re going to manifest, right? We need to get people thinking about who or what the safe containers are in their lives. For some folks it’s their relationship; for others it’s their bank accounts. But either way, we need to show them who or what to invest more time in if they’re going to hit their targets.

Sun in Scorpio: Humans need to invest in themselves, right at the core of their radiant beings, and forfeit their concerns for material ambition.

Saturn in Libra: But, they’re only human. Their material concerns are a necessary foundation upon which to grow spiritually mature.

Chiron in Aquarius: So then, we need to help people build a bridge that connects them to their cores, to their material reality, to each other, and to us. That bridge will lead to the new world they’re already trying to inhabit.

Pluto in Capricorn: Well you know I’ve always said that bridges are for burning.

Mars in Leo: Need a light? I’ve got a match here.

Sun in Scorpio: I am the light. And, as dark as the days ahead may appear to some, I am always here, through all of these changes. I am the one sure thing upon which the human race can count.

Pluto in Capricorn: Well, so am I.

(Everyone shoots a look at Pluto.)

Pluto in Capricorn: Hey, at least I don’t collect taxes…